Kool map game

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Re: Kool map game

Post by Burke »

So many penis jokes already, but not enough yet.
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Re: Kool map game

Post by Drydic »

...Where did Detroit come from?
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Re: Kool map game

Post by Burke »

The deepest foulest pits of Hell. And based on their financial practices, they're headed back there in a hand-basket.


Unless they mug Cleveland.
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Re: Kool map game

Post by Pole, the »

I noticed only Ding Dong, and just after I decided to contribute. But I didn't read the stuff so closely.
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Re: Kool map game

Post by Pogostick Man »

Drydic Guy wrote:...Where did Detroit come from?
I added it. The plan was to write in a short description but then I ended up playing video games for a couple hours.
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Re: Kool map game

Post by Burke »

Linguifex wrote:
Drydic Guy wrote:...Where did Detroit come from?
I added it. The plan was to write in a short description but then I ended up playing video games for a couple hours.
I don't blame you.

I try to keep my distance from Detroit as much as possible.

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Re: Kool map game

Post by Drydic »

Linguifex wrote:
Drydic Guy wrote:...Where did Detroit come from?
I added it. The plan was to write in a short description but then I ended up playing video games for a couple hours.
I knew you did. My question was a *HINT HINT* to you.
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Re: Kool map game

Post by Pogostick Man »

Drydic Guy wrote:
Linguifex wrote:
Drydic Guy wrote:...Where did Detroit come from?
I added it. The plan was to write in a short description but then I ended up playing video games for a couple hours.
I knew you did. My question was a *HINT HINT* to you.
Detroit is a parliamentary democracy situated north of Cleveland. Its capital is Motor City and its chief export is heavy industry, almost exclusively involving automobiles and other sorts of vehicles, although high-powered tools supplement this. Interestingly, the large city of Motown is a relatively huge cultural influence, with major production and export of music. Despite these strengths, the country is currently experiencing severe troubles, including depopulation, bankruptcy, high crime rates, low real estate value and a general state of falling into disrepair.

Sizable Hispanic and Hmong minorities are present, the former mainly concentrating in Mexicantown.*

Other cities of import include Greektown, Bricktown, Royal Oak, Brightmoor, East English Village, and Belle Isle. These are mainly important because most of the rest of the communities in Detroit have been mostly or totally abandoned. There also exists a semi-autonomous province called Hamtramck, an enclave of Detroit, which is distinguished among other things by a large immigrant population.

* According to Wikipedia that is an actual neighborhood in Detroit with a high Hispanic population.
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Re: Kool map game

Post by ol bofosh »

Gnomia - the Gnome empire, ruled over by the Great Emperor David, who rides about on foxes and hides others people's odd socks under his beard. On his spare time, which is considerable, he likes nothing better than to fish completely stationary by a pond without catching anything. One day he caught a goldfish, which was a huge disappointment, but not as much as the time he caught a cold. All the other gnomes have gone on holiday to The Goink, but David doesn't know when they'll be back. In the meantime he maintains the borders well-trimmed.

Chief export would be cheese, but the mice don't sit still enough for David to collect the milk.
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Re: Kool map game

Post by Daistallia »

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Billy Smith's Locker is an underwater realm inhabited by a large population of slightly naughty animated underpants, all once owned by a kid from Macon Georgia (a suburb of Tbilisi) named Jim-Bob- Saakashvili. Nobody knows where the name Billy Smith originated. The main exports are dingle berries, chocolate covered bananas, and nuclear weapons.

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Re: Kool map game

Post by Izambri »

The Cobbled Kingdom of Brat'n and Airland (CK) is a sovereign state located near the center of Eastia, south of the Equator and bordering the Prudë Sea.

Once a powerful maritime empire that ruled many peoples in all continents almost nothing was kept after the Jack-and-Jizz Wars except a few insular lands, the Cobbled Overseas Territories (COT), constituted by 12 sovereign entities that have in common the monarch of the CK. The CK and the COT constitute the Catalogue of Nations (CN).

The CK's form of government is a heteroclitic monarchy with a parliamentary system and its capital city is Langd'n. It is also the core of the Catalogue of Nations. Brat'n influence can be observed in the language, culture, and legal systems of many of its former colonies.

The Cobbled Kingdom is a developed country and has the world's sixth-largest economy by nominal GDP and eighth-largest pastry-oriented economy. It was the world's first deindustrialised country. The CK remains a great power with considerable economic, cultural, military, scientific, and political influence internationally. It is a recognised pickled weapons state and its military expenditure ranks fourth in the world.

The economy of the Cobbled Kingdom relies on its monarchy, which is the main producer and worldwide leader of royally sex-factured heirs to the CK throne and ex-colonial states. Other important exports are coffee cups, fridge magnets, banderoles and tacky wide ladyhats stamped with the ruler's face.

The diplomatic foreign relations of the Cobbled Kingdom are implemented by the Foreign and Overseas Office. Grand Brat'n was the world's foremost power during the past centuries, wielding significant and often preeminent influence upon world affairs through its financial and industrial power, its Regal Navy and the vast extent of its Brat'isc Empire. Until the Ricola Crisis of 36256 it was considered a superpower. However, the flagging economy, cost of two Mesosphere Wars and the loss of Empire after 36246 steadily diminished its power. Nevertheless, the Cobbled Kingdom remains a major power and a permanent member of the Leagued Nations Happiness Council, a Member state of the Merkelatic Union, and a founding member of the KH7, GI-JOE, SPELL, TWO, Council of Merkele, OHCM, and the Catalogue of Nations, which is a legacy of the Brat'isc Empire.
In general, the Cobbled Kingdom has good relations with all its former colonies, although some members of the Cobbled Overseas Territories (COT) and the Catalogue of Nations (CN) have border and maritime claim issues with foreign powers:
  • 1. The city-state of Singleporus (CN), one of the world's main ports and financial centers, has some maritime issues with Super Mario World concerning sea trade routes through the Mario Straits, which are threatened by a stone face emerging from the water.
    2. Dorks and Thieves (COT) was claimed by Nan during the Jack-and-Jizz Wars, although the status of that dispute is unclear now.
    3. Holy Kids and Snowyourself (COT) lies to the west of Kroh, with no issues with that nation.
    4. Austraylands (CN), southwest of Kroh, has no issues with that nation.
    5. Trinity and Tobacco (CN) has unresolved maritime claims with People's Republic of People.
    6. Makmarøkkr, part of the former Brat'isc Deflowered Islands (CN), lies along the Northern Megalo Ocean. It has no issues with any nation.
    7. Dewlap New Hog (COT) lies in front of the coast of Yapan with no known issues with that nation.
    8. Old and Bearded (CN), is constantly annoyed by Aurora Rossa Federation.
    9. Pomegranate (CN, Sovereign Base Area), is constantly annoyed by Aurora Rossa Federation.
    10. Lionrange (CN, Sovereign Base Area) is an island in front of the northwest coast of Áaa. The island was claimed by Áaa in the past, but since Áaaians don't like to talk to or interacting with foreigners the dispute is unresolved and its current status, unknown.
    11. Sovereign Base Areas of Agroteeny and Darkelia (COT, Sovereign Base Area) is a small island in front of the northern coast of Jemasworld. Formerly a pirate treasure island, it was annexed to the Brat'isc Empire centuries ago during the Bearded Pirates Wars, making it the oldest Brat'isc overseas possession. Retained after the loss of the Empire now serves as a Royal Air Force base. No disputes are known.
    12. Saint Torch, Elevator and Drystan Wedge (COT), disputed by KCUF and Nan.
____________________________

Cobbled Kingdom of Brat'n and Airland

Motto All Things for All People, Everywhere
Anthem Let's Wave the King
-----
Capital Langd'n ['ɫɑŋn:]
-----
Languages Fungl'isc
Regional languages Grawlf, Glanc'h, Lulz-Scrot, Sindarin, Kwek-kwek
-----
Demonym Brat'isc
-----
Government Unitary heteroclitic constitutional monarchy
Monarch Conon Robespierre the Hudsonth
Prime Minister Tath Beed
-----
Legislature Antique Parliament
Upper House House of Hordes
Lower House House of Chintzies
-----
Formation Acts of Cobbling, 1 Milt'n 25774
-----
Currency Thump outstanding
-----
Drives on the underground
-----
Calling code +244
-----
Internet TLD .ck
Last edited by Izambri on Thu Nov 21, 2013 5:06 pm, edited 11 times in total.
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Re: Kool map game

Post by Radius Solis »

Image

In the center of the central continent lies the small nation of Hutaz. It is populated by owls. It is ruled by owls. Its main export is, similarly, owls. Its unit of currency is the field mouse, and its form of government is constitutional hootocracy, in which the owls gather together and hooo at each other until all current problems are solved.

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Re: Kool map game

Post by Izambri »

Zibban is a country in northeastern South Centerica. Bordered clockwise by Eritrea, Jaawi Ruusih, Nyo, Detroit, Hutaz, Aurora Rossa, Kluk and Yiyenmenyon, the Zombie Sea washes its southern shore and the Middlelandean Sea its northeastern short littoral section.

A mid-sized country, Zibban is ethnically diverse and has a population of around 76 million. It is a mountainous country of particular geopolitical significance owing to its location in three spheres of South Centerica: Middlelandean, Caffenaited and Centerican. Dabōrd is the capital, the country's most populous city and the political, cultural, chattering and artistic center of the nation. Known as a developing country, Zibban is a regional power, and holds an important position in international phonetic security and world chattering as a result of its large reserves of phonemes and conlangs. Zibban has the largest proven conlang reserves in the world, and the fourth largest proven phoneme inventory reserves.

Zibban is home to one of the world's oldest civilizations. The first dynasty in Zibban formed during the Oldboardite kingdom in 12800, ruling peoples who spoke Tålkinic languages. Ancient Zibbanians unified Zibban into an empire in 12925, and the country extended its existence quite peacefully for centuries (with the notable exception of the Homorganic Wars and the Ejective's Uprising) until 20633, when Zåmpstami armies invaded the country, completely conquering the region by 20651. The emergence in 21501 of the Aspinnid dynasty, which promoted the use of a wider set of phonemes to make conlangs, marked one of the most important turning points in Zibbanian and Zåmpstami history. After the Flamewar Revolts the Zibbanian Constitutional Revolution established the nation's first parliament in 35996, within a constitutional monarchy. Following a coup d'état instigated by the Cobbled Kingdom and the United Orwellian Empire in 36053, Zibban gradually became a more autocratic country. Growing dissent with foreign influence culminated during the Zibbanian Revolution which led to the establishment of a Zåmpstamic republic on 1 Vërdu 36079.
A small number if Zibbanians, dissatisfied with the evolution of events, digged a canal in the southern seashore, enclosing a small portion of land that became the newborn artificial island of Cebba. The secessionists proclaimed a republic in 28 Vezsa 36081, but it partially sinked shortly after. Its current status is non-cared by the Zibbanians, and diplomatic relations are non-existent between both states.

Zibban is a founding member of the Muddled Nations Organization (MNO), KH7, OINK and TFIT. The political system of Zibban, based on the 36079 constitution, combines elements of a parliamentary democracy with a fricative-uvular theocracy run by the country’s policeclergy. The highest state authority is the Supreme Leader. A loose version of Zåmpstam is the official religion and Zebbian is the official language, but no one really cares.
In fact, nobody cares much about the government, the laws, the Revolution or its leaders, basically because the leader practically snubs any issue, de facto delegating the power to the policeclergy, which, for its part, acts more or less like the rest of the population. Considering that and the cultural and linguistic hotchpotch Zibban is, the country runs quite well.

Zibban is renowned for its longstanding c'n'c culture as well as the more recent ephemeral chatter. The percentage of homosexual and heterosexual zibbanians is quite balanced, although there's a permanent feeling of a latent homosexual majority. Foreigners and new citizens are welcome, although they may have some hard time adapting to the country's customs and traditions, especially the newcomer welcome cerimony, a mix of tasty food and incisive questions. Due to its ethnic diversity the country speaks many languages besides Zebbian. Clannish life is important and varied thanks to the country's mountainous orography; clan leagues, like the Isxari or the Elmeë, play an important role in every day politics and culture.

____________________________

Zåmpstamic Republic of Zibban

Motto "Welcome And Have Fun"
Anthem Tea and Pickles
-----
Capital Dabōrd [dəˈbɔ:d]
-----
Languages Zebbian (official). Many natlangs and conlangs
-----
Demonym Zibbanian
-----
Government Unitary theocratic zåmpstamic republic
Supreme leader Maki Rzenflnei
President unknown, supposedly vacant
First Vice President unknown
Speaker of the Parliament unknown
Chief Justice unknown
-----
Legislature Zåmpstamic Consultative Assembly
-----
Formation
Oldboardite Kingdom 12800
Zibbanid Empire 12925
Aspinnid Empire 21501
Imperial State of Zibban 35996
Current constitution 36079
-----
Currency z'bial
-----
Drives on the thread
-----
Calling code +822
-----
Internet TLD .zb
Last edited by Izambri on Thu Nov 21, 2013 5:06 pm, edited 3 times in total.
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Re: Kool map game

Post by Pole, the »

Radius Solis wrote:http://i.imgur.com/k222pru.png

In the center of the central continent lies the small nation of Hutaz. It is populated by owls. It is ruled by owls. Its main export is, similarly, owls. Its unit of currency is the field mouse, and its form of government is constitutional hootocracy, in which the owls gather together and hooo at each other until all current problems are solved.
Well, are you familiar with the meaning of Polish kutas? ;p
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Re: Kool map game

Post by clawgrip »

Image
The nation of Hypophallos is a mostly agrarian country in the southern portion of the central continent. Its highly rural population produces a great amount of grain and seeds, with most of its exports being sent north of the border. The King of Hypophallos is Zeus, who marshals the thunderheads.

Hypophallos must periodically defend itself from severe bee attacks from the FTB, and imports powerful pesticides from Vórmósjimolót to this end.

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Re: Kool map game

Post by MKasbar »

The Republic of Molossia is a micronation, founded by Kevin Baugh, humorously as a "dictatorial banana-republic" and headquartered solely from a tiny home north of Billy Smith's Locker and the Sea-Public of Pirate-Topia. It consists of one island in the north. According to author John Ryan, Molossia is "a hobby... that has been pushed... to the nth degree." Originally established as a childhood project in 1977, Molossia subsequently evolved into a territorial entity in the late 1990s. The name Molossia is derived from the Spanish word morro which means "small rocky hill". Baugh has stated that the ancient Greek tribe of Molossians is unrelated. The Republic of Molossia has claimed to be fighting a war with Billy Smith's Locker and it has issued war bonds to stop the war. It claims to have been fighting it since November 2, 1983 (Their website: http://www.molossia.org/).
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Re: Kool map game

Post by Izambri »

xxx
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Re: Kool map game

Post by ol bofosh »

Note to Bonk from Gnomia: could you keep in down in there, we're trying to get to sleep.
P.S. I've almost finished with the lawnmower, you can have it back over the weekend.
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Re: Kool map game

Post by Burke »

In response to the declaration of war, Jaawi Ruusih's National Assembly has gathered and seeks to make a public pronouncement.

"Jaawi Ruusih shall remain in neutrality in the midst of the war of her neighbors. We seek to continue to serve you and support our relations. For this reason all non-military related trade should continue, unless such trade can be shown to be unethical by some means. Military vessels from the country may not dock in our harbors. This is for the safety of our own people and ecology, and we hope that it would be respected. Tourism and mercantile exchanges are still open, but if they should be shown to bear anything military or unethical to this situation, that person shall be deported back to their country immediately. Repeat offenses by either side risks the severing of relations, temporarily. Repeat individual offenders risk deportation to Eritrea.

Should either side show threat to Jaawi Ruusih, or act in a manner implying that, neutrality may need to begrudginly be put on hold.

Again, we hope and pray that our neighbors might resolve their conflict soon and peaceably.

Have a nice day, and have a nice day."

Message end

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Re: Kool map game

Post by Click »

The FFFF is delivering prostitutes to the warring sides. This should stop the war in two weeks or so.

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Re: Kool map game

Post by Burke »

Just don't dock them in Eritrea...
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Re: Kool map game

Post by Radius Solis »

Chairman for Life Sukmidik, speaking drunkenly from his palace in the FFFF capital Yuleminao, has proclaimed a day of public rejoicing and revelry, in celebration of anticipated profit from the ongoing war.

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Re: Kool map game

Post by Click »

The gods have enlargened the world.

Image

The CI, or the Carol Islands, are a small equatorial archipelago just to the right of the dateline. The Carol Islands have avoided colonization by Nan and other colonial powers by establishing themselves as a tax haven. The only, yet extremely profitable export is fine coral powder made of a coral endemic to the shallow waters of the Carol Islands, worldwide believed to cure impotence.

In other news, a ship full of prostitutes from the FFFF was caught in a severe tropical thunderstorm so it had to dock in a harbor somewhere in central Eritrea. Top demographic experts from Zibban expect that the already very quick growth of the Eritrean population is to increase even more.

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Re: Kool map game

Post by Izambri »

xxx
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Re: Kool map game

Post by ol bofosh »

Advertisement: Country-mate wanted to share country. Must be clean, polite and toilet trained. Knowledge of origami an advantage. No pets bigger than a gnome; they might eat me.

Applicants must provide following details...
Previous country of origin:
Head size (red pointy hat is obligatory):
Approximate species:
Last time you flew on a ferret's back:
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