the Old Granny thread

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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by gach »

I had some excellent fish tacos on my recent visit to Flagstaff. Now I need to experiment which Finnish fish is best suited for making these. If someone has any experience on the subject please tell me.

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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by vampireshark »

Pork Schnitzel à la vampireshark
This is probably not extremely authentic and it's probably preaching to the choir with the number of Germans and Germanophiles on the board, but it's a recipe that I've found works for replicating delicious Schnitzel without having to fly across the Atlantic.
· boneless center-cut pork chops or dedicated pork Schnitzel meat (if you have a German grocery store or butcher nearby, they may be able to have some good quality pork available)
· flour
· milk
· breadcrumbs (I use a German Schnitzel breading that one can find at, again, a lot of German supermarkets in the US)
· shortening

1.) Cut the pork chops to not more than about a finger's width thick. Lightly pound them to thin and flatten them.
2.) Dredge the pork in flour first, then in milk. This helps the breading stick.
3.) Evenly coat the meat with breadcrumbs.
4.) In a frying pan suitable for frying, melt the shortening over medium-high heat. Once melted and sufficiently hot, add Schnitzel.
5.) Cook for about 5 minutes before turning. Repeat the process until desired golden-brown color and crispiness is achieved.
6.) Remove and cool on wire racks (to help drain away the oil and keep the breading crispy).
7.) Consume in large quantities, preferably with sliced lemons for garnish and a salad of some vague flavor to accompany it.
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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by sirdanilot »

^No. No. Just no.

- Schnitzel should be flat, in order for it to be more tender and all. Pound it flat with something, ideally a meat hammer but anything else will do.
- No shortening. Schnitzel should be fried in Butterschmalz which is clarified butter, and you can make this by slowly simmering butter in a saucepan for a while, then slowly pouring off the butter and leaving the butter residue at the bottom of the pan. Or you could just deep fry it TBH (but then you cannot make it as flat as it should, or you have to make very small ones)
- Where's the egg? I would roll the pork in flour, then put it in some beaten egg, then cover it with breadcrumbs. Why milk?!


Now I personally don't have a frier so I don't make a lot of fried things. But I should try to make Schnitzel some time. In fact maybe in the near future since I have some chicken breast laying around (and yes, schnitzel made from chicken is completely acceptable. veal is the real thing but that's too expensive, and chicken is very acceptable as a substitute).

And a frugal trick when you fried something is to reuse the fat, by pouring it through a coffee filter.

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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by din »

He did put in the instructions that you should pound them though.

And milk does the trick too. Especially if you've run out of eggs.
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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by sirdanilot »

Oh I read over the pounding part, good.

But no milk does not seem like a good idea to me I don't think. Anything we deepfry is flour egg breadcrumb. You can also use this nifty new Japanese product called 'panko' which produces an excellent deep frying layer, better than those little crumbs of bread crumbs from the supermarket. It's arriving at stores more and more these days which is nice.

Milk things tend to brown a lot in the fryer and/or burn.

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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by vampireshark »

sirdanilot wrote:But no milk does not seem like a good idea to me I don't think. Anything we deepfry is flour egg breadcrumb. You can also use this nifty new Japanese product called 'panko' which produces an excellent deep frying layer, better than those little crumbs of bread crumbs from the supermarket. It's arriving at stores more and more these days which is nice.
Thing is that Schnitzel isn't, at least how I make it, deep-fried. And normally I beat egg into the milk, but the milk, at least in my experience, just gives the first flour layer that good level of stickiness to make sure the breading stays adhered properly and doesn't puff off or come off once the frying has been accomplished. It's just how my family for the last twenty or so years does a lot of frying, such as for fried eggplant: flour, milk to moisten the flour and get it appropriately sticky, then breading layer of whatever flavor. I've not had anything burn in the frypan, though... granted, I haven't deep-fried anything yet, as most of what I do is pan frying in a thin-ish layer of oil/shortening/grease.

Also, it's a cost issue. A dozen eggs here starts at about $2, whereas a gallon of milk (~4 litres) runs about $3. As much as I like to cook, I'm on a bit of a restricted budget.


Regarding Butterschmalz: Butter is significantly more expensive than vegetable shortening here in Ohio. A pound (500g) of butter is about thrice as expensive as an equivalent amount of shortening. Quite frankly, I prefer cooking with butter, but it's just not cost-effective when significant amounts of butter have to be used just for Schnitzel for one person.

Plus, the one Swiss friend of my mom's tends to approve of this recipe as being "authentic" (recipe sourced from her), so, at least the first time around, I didn't want to screw with it.
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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by vampireshark »

Oh, and here's a recipe that hopefully provokes less argument:

Scharfkäse
A hot cheese spread of presumably Greek or Turkish origin that I was introduced to in Germany long, long ago. I prepare it in a food processor/chopper, but I think you could probably do it in a mortar and pestle. The directions below, though, are probably more suitable for the former.
· 8 oz/250 g brick of feta cheese
· 1 tsp chopped fresh oregano or dried oregano
· 1 tsp lemon juice
· fuckton of fresh garlic to taste (I normally use 5 to 6 cloves, but I like garlic)
· 1 tlb chili pepper powder*
· olive oil

1.) Cut feta into small cubes to shove into the food processor. Peel the garlic, but do not cut it.
2.) In the food processor, start by finely chopping the garlic.
3.) Add feta cubes and chop some more.
4.) Add the chili pepper powder, oregano, and lemon juice. Pulse even more until a nice, uniform orange color is achieved.
5.) While still pulsing, slowly drizzle in olive oil to your desired consistency. A few teaspoons should produce a nice spread that's good for bread.
6.) Chill before consumption.

*I find that the best kinds of chili pepper powder, at least in the US, that you can use are Korean hot pepper powder (gochugalu) or Turkish smoked hot pepper. The former is, at least where I live, much easier to find and does the job well, but the Turkish gives a nicer flavor.
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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by sirdanilot »

The scharfkase looks interesting, never heard of it, it also doesn't look even remotely german which is odd !

About the schnitzel:

-Price of eggs. Now I am definitely one to hear you for recipes that use like 6+ eggs or something, but seriously you only need a single egg to bread the schnitzel and you can fry the leftover for a little omelette or something, to eat on the side. That's honestly not even remotely expensive. Eggs can also be kept very long in the fridge, while milk spoils pretty fast. I rarely ever let my food spoil, but me spoiling milk is pretty common (or a bit more commonly I see that the best before date is tomorrow so I have to use it all in one go, for example I make some kind of 'custard' (dutch word vla). We get about 24 eggs here for, like, 2,50. One liter of milk costs 65 cents or something.

-Price of butter. Yes butter is a bit expensive, I would use I think two packages (500g?) which costs about 2,20 euros BUT you don't use it only once, if you make butterschmalz then fry your schnitzel in it you can pour it through a filter and you can keep it for a very long time and reuse it.
But if this is not an option I would even use oil rather than shortening. Regular oil (sunflower) is also cheap and is better for frying (like 60 cents for a liter, maybe even for 1.5 liter but not sure)

And it doesn't really matter whether you shallow fry or deep fry. I do not own a frier so I would shallow fry too I think, but you just turn it and you get almost the same effect.

By the way, the pouring through a coffee filter also works for oil. We always did this at home, never used the oil only once. We used the oil mostly for potato fries, then at the end when it was getting old (after quite a bit of reuses) we would fry something else, such as Dutch 'kaassouflee' which is essentially cheese in a dough and breaded, which tends to explose if not fried well which spoils your oil. Or we would fry fish in it or something (very bad idea to fry fish in the oil, then fry something else).

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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by Dewrad »

For what it's worth, re-used oil is actually better (within reason and depending on the oil) for frying. For example, I would change the oil in my fryers about weekly or so, and it was always better after about three or so days.
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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by Astraios »

Porridge isn't very exciting, but White Russian porridge is.

- oats
- milk
- vodka
- cream
- brown sugar
- ginger powder
- cinnamon powder
- lemon juice

, in uncertain quantities according to taste, but probably more sugar than necessary, and only a little bit of vodka. And sweet black coffee on the side because coffee.

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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by sirdanilot »

Vodka in porridge sounds pretty good, is the wodka added after the cooking process or during? Cause that makes the difference between one boozy start of the day and a sober one, heh.

My best way of making porridge is by soaking the oats in milk during the night, and then add some more milk in the morning and boil them. I never like the result if I forget soaking the oats first. But because I do often forget this, I stopped eating porridge for breakfast mostly. I would add vanilla sugar, cinnamon, and sugar, or I wouldn't add any sugar and eat it with ' stroop' (a thick dark syrup).

Of course it's better with cream, but health and cost prevent me from adding cream. I would often add a bit of butter for a similar effect.

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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by Salmoneus »

Black olives in melanzane parmigiana = surprisingly, not a good idea it seems. Mince lamb, on the other hand, an excellent idea (although I don't know if that makes it still a deviant parmigiana, or just a deviant moussaka...). Baked couscous crust on same, also a good idea, but only when cooked with stock, otherwise it's far too plain.
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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by Astraios »

sirdanilot wrote:Vodka in porridge sounds pretty good, is the wodka added after the cooking process or during? Cause that makes the difference between one boozy start of the day and a sober one, heh.
I put it in as an afterthought to the thing I'd already made, because the new bottle caught my eye. :p

sirdanilot wrote:My best way of making porridge is by soaking the oats in milk during the night, and then add some more milk in the morning and boil them. I never like the result if I forget soaking the oats first.
What's the difference? Texture?

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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by sirdanilot »

Yes, the texture is different. The plain oats we get here (rolled oats I think) are just not good textured, they are flat and dry Just boiling them in milk doesn't make them nice and plump and moist, you need to soak them in milk overnight so they absorb the milk, then add a bit more milk and boil them. The structure is better because the individual oat pieces are a bit more, well, plump. The porridge also gets abit thicker.

I guess you should just try it once and see if you like it more than instantly boiled oats.

But yes, the main downside is thaty ou have to remember the night before to put your oats in a pan with some milk. It doesn't cost any extra time other than that, in fact it saves time because the oats cook quicker this way.

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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by Salmoneus »

Fried onions, red pepper. Chopped tomatoes, bacon, cook slowly. Black olives. Cayenne pepper, chili oil. Small amount of milk a few times (adds fatty goodness and stops it from drying out). I did gnocchi, although of course pasta or the like would do. Cooked shredded crab meat added near the end. Parmesan. Delicious. Probably unhealthy.

Went surprisingly well with chilled mead.

By good fortune, however, hilled mead went perfectly with a chocolate ganachy-sort-of dessert that somebody else didn't want.
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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by sirdanilot »

Today was cooking disaster day. I had all sorts of leftovers on the verge of spoiling and put them together. Oftentimes the result is surprisingly good but today it just wasn't, I wasn't in the mood for cooking anyway.

Better next time, if I just pay some attention then usually my food is at least good, and sometimes even delicious.

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Cooking

Post by sirdanilot »

We used to have a cooking thread but I couldn't find it sorry
Hey all,

I wanted to share with you something unrelated to politics, religion or linguistics, something which is my hobby. I am fond of food and drink. So let me share how to make the traditional Dutch and Belgian fries.

They differ from the American fries you are probably used to in that they a) contain only potato, oil and salt, no additives or coatings which they use at American restaurants such as mcdonalds and burger king b)are cut thicker than the american fries you find at, for example, McDonalds. Note that the Belgian fries are even thicker than the Dutch fries (the dutch stole it from the belgians). c) they are served with Mayonnaise. Not with the weird sauce you may be used to which you get at McDonalds, and also generally not with ketchup, although you can serve it with both ketchup and mayonaise if you want and a variety of other sauces. But mayonnaise is nearly imperative for proper fries.

Ingredients:
- Potatoes that become soft when cooked (so not the hard ones which you use for salad). Potatoes of the type 'Bintje' are the best but I could not find them today.
- Oil or beef fat. Beef fat is best, but not very healthy, so vegetable oil or hardened deep frying fat will do. Peanut oil is also very good. The oil does not need to be completely clean.
- Salt

For the mayonnaise:
- 2 egg yolks (or one larger egg yolk). contrary to what you think, odds of salmonella infection don't get higher if the eggs are older, though of course fresh eggs are best in any case.
- sunflower oil
- vinegar (fancier types of vinegar = more flavour)
- salt
- sugar (this is a no-no for Belgian mayonnaise, but hte Dutch one is slightly sweetened)
- mustard, preferably smooth mustard and not the course one

Fries preparation
- Fill a bowl with salt cold water
- Peel the potatoes, remove any eyes, and put them in the water
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/294 ... 180026.jpg
- Cut the potatoes in slices like so
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/294 ... 180501.jpg
- Then slice them into fries in the thickness you desire. Aspire an even thickness if you can. However my knife skills are not perfect.
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/294 ... 180529.jpg
- Put the fries in the salted water immediately. Keep it for a short while (15 mins? 30 mins?).
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/294 ... 181356.jpg
Mayonnaise preparation
- Put the vinegar, salt, sugar and musterd into a cup which fits your stick blender. The cup must be about the same diameter as the stick blender. Mix it and taste it: it should be a bit TOO everything (too sour, too salty, too mustardy) for your liking then it's good. Not too sweet, though. The sugar is only for a slight balance, and the original Belgian mayonnaise hasn’t got any sugar at all even.
- Add the egg yolk. For a thicker mayonnaise the white is not added, for a saucier mayonnaise the egg white could be added but not too much.
- Add the oil right on top of everything (this is not the classical french method but a short-cut ! we dutch like short cuts).
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/294 ... 182053.jpg
- Put the stick blender right to the bottom and blend for 5 seconds, then while you continue blending very slowly pull the blender up until everything is emulsified. Do not overblend it.
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/294 ... 182239.jpg
- store the mayonnaise in the fridge, and consume it within a few dies so that you do not die from food poisoning !

(note: I used only one small egg yolk and the mayonnaise was a bit runny. so do as I suggest here, one big egg yolk or two small ones. I also forgot the mustard at first, you should add it with everything else as the mustard has an emulsifying effect. but I didn’t have the smooth mustard anyway, only the coarse one)

Fries frying
- Properly dry the fries. If you do not, you will die or get 3rd degree burns, or your fries will at least fail.
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/294 ... 190355.jpg
- Preheat oil at 140 C (go google for fahrenheit, my dear americans)
- Pre-fry the fries until they are soft enough so as to be edible. The fries should not crisp up too much at this stage. Do not fry it too long or they will become soggy (mine went a tad too long here).
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/294 ... 193121.jpg
- Drain the fries of fat in your frying basket while you preheat the oil to 180 c
- Now fry the fries in smaller batches to crisp them uup at 180 c, they should be nice golden brown Do not fry them too long. My oil was sadly a bit hotter than 180 and my fries went a bit dark, so don’t overdo it.
- Drain of oil after frying each batch and salt them shortly after frying for maximum salt absorption. Keep in mind that they have already soaked in salted water so don't oversalt.

- serve the fries with several types of Dutch deep fried snacks, a bit of vegetable or salad, and the mayo. You could also serve it with some ketchup or with Dutch-Indonesian peanut sauce or with stewed Belgian meat or with Dutch mussels, etc. etc. whatever your heart desires. Or a hamburger for the truly American. why not? we also eat hamburgers here due to American cultural influence.

FAQ
- Why is the potato soaked?
to remove any starch from the potato. this is why the water turns cloudy, the starch seeps out of the potato

- why is the water salted?
for more crisp fries and more salt within the fry rather than around the outside

- why is the fry pre-fried?
otherwhise the inside is raw and the outside is burnt, or the fry will not crisp up

- will I die if I eat the mayonnaise?
don't eat it if you are pregnant or very very old or have a very weark immune system. but the odds of salmonella are not so high that you should not eat fresh mayonaise from time to time.

- what are the benefits of home-made mayonnaise?
so you don't have to buy a pot of mayonnaise and you can tweak the flavour to your liking and it also tastes nicer. you can make it with pantry items you have at home

- why are fries eaten with mayonnaise?
because we can

- can I freeze the fries?
YES, you can freeze the pre-fried fries I think, but I have not tried it myself. We can easily buy bagged fries here and I usually don't bother to make fresh fries unless I am going to eat them immediately. You could make it if you have a huge batch of potatoes that needs to be finished, such as after potato harvest.

- can I leave the potato peel on?
YES, but it is not the traditional way and not preferred. I suggest making oven baked potatoes if you want to eat potato with the peel on as it's more delicious and nutritious.

- does the quality of potatoes matter?
YES. If the potatoes are too 'glassy' (we call it glazig, sorry I don't know an appropriate english term) the fries will not be yummy. Make sure to remove any eyes and any sprouted or green potato parts.

- can I also boil the potato first and then fry them?
there is a method that steams the potato and then fries them twice. but it sounds like too much work to me. you cannot boil it fully as the fries will fall apart. boiling it partially, then frying it could work, but the potato would be too moist and not become crispy fries. so I think it's best to stick to this method as it works.

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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by sirdanilot »

Oh why thank you mods

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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by Io »

What's that.... thing... on the bottom two pictures: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maafe#/me ... galais.jpg ?!

The closest I can describe it is something of a lard or mushroom.

In other news: I've just made shukshuka, it's really simple but incredibly delicious (and it leaves the hob a complete mess, yay!). Basically, you start by frying onions and red peppers, once they're soft you add chopped garlic, cumin, (hot) paprika, black pepper, salt, (I also added a bit from the Georgian mix called hmeli-suneli and coriander) and finely chopped/grated tomatoes.

Let it simmer and once it thickens and most of the water is gone, add chopped parsley, crack the eggs and throw it in the oven for a few minutes for the eggs to cook.

Google it for more, there are some variations and I saw a recipe which includes feta as well.

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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by Nortaneous »

big bump. I mentioned NORT PORK elsewhere, so here is the recipe for NORT PORK

Ingredients:
- pork of some sort, ideally pork chops
- Sichuan peppercorns
- soy sauce
- rice vinegar
- butter
- whatever else you want to put in the sauce (oyster sauce can work, as can peanut butter)

Instructions:
- cut the pork into small pieces so it doesn't take forever to cook
- bung it in a pan with some butter and some Sichuan peppercorns, maybe two dozen or so. err low rather than high
- let the pork chops cook about halfway
- throw in the soy sauce and rice vinegar
- cook the pork chops the remainder of the way

If you want to do it right, add the Sichuan peppercorns and butter first and let them sit there on low heat for a while, but I usually don't bother. Ground Sichuan peppercorns would be better but five-spice powder isn't very good on pork chops.
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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by alynnidalar »

Here is a recipe for The Easiest Tomato-Based Pasta Sauce You Ever Did See:

1 can of tomato paste (~6 oz or a bit under 1 cup) (~180 mL)
1 can diced tomatoes (~14-15 oz or a bit under 2 cups) (~430 mL)
1 can tomato sauce (~8 oz or around 1 cup) (~235 mL)
1 tsp salt (~5 mL, or a normal spoon)
1 tsp oregano
1 tsp basil
1 Tbsp parsley (~15 mL, or a large spoon)
1 Tbsp sugar (to start with, you may want to add a little more if it's not enough)
1/2 tsp red pepper flakes (just... shake some in)
1/2 tsp black pepper (ditto)

To make it more interesting, you can also saute some green peppers, onions, mushrooms, etc. or use fresh herbs instead of dried. (if you're using fresh herbs, use 2-3 times as much) All of the spices are optional and can easily be swapped out if you prefer a different flavor or don't have it at hand. Precise measurements don't matter at all (especially when it comes to the tomatoes).

Dump everything in a pot big enough to hold it. Stir it together. Simmer for a half hour. Refrigerate or freeze whatever you're not going to use right away.

(Pro-tip for extremely lazy people who live on their own: buy frozen onions/green peppers instead of fresh. They taste just fine when cooked, you don't have to worry about them going bad, and because they're frozen when ripe, they're as fresh as the non-frozen kind. No need to thaw before cooking if they're in small pieces; they thaw and cook quickly.)
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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by hwhatting »

Nortaneous wrote:big bump. I mentioned NORT PORK elsewhere, so here is the recipe for NORT PORK
I first read that as NOT PORK. :-)

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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by jmcd »

Oops my message got eaten last night.

Nort Pork sounds like it would be tasty. When do you add the peanut butter?

--
Own idea:
Mango sausage salad:
For vinaigrette:
white wine vinegar
few drops of oil
few drops of tabasco
salt
pepper

other ingredients:
3 mangoes
2 thick sausages
1 large onion

1. boil, then fry the sausages
2. Mix vinaigrette together, in order specified
3. Peel mangoes
4. Chop mangoes into rough cube shapes
5. Slice sausages and onions
6. Mix everything together and enjoy!

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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by Nortaneous »

Add peanut butter late, ideally once the pork is cooked enough that you can turn the heat down. Otherwise it'll burn.
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Joined: Fri Mar 12, 2004 11:46 am
Location: Réunion
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Re: the Old Granny thread

Post by jmcd »

Oh thanks. So it's really while it's simmering that it's an addded extra then.

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