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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Sat Jul 07, 2012 6:28 pm 
Sumerul
Sumerul

Joined: Fri Mar 05, 2010 2:38 am
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Location: Israel
Qwynegold wrote:
That guy I wrote about earlier; it didn't work out with him. :( Then today I got to meet a guy who's the cutest ever! But I get the feeling that he likes me more like a friend. :cry:
Huuuug. Poor Q.


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Sat Jul 07, 2012 6:54 pm 
Smeric
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Astraios wrote:
Qwynegold wrote:
That guy I wrote about earlier; it didn't work out with him. :( Then today I got to meet a guy who's the cutest ever! But I get the feeling that he likes me more like a friend. :cry:
Huuuug. Poor Q.

*cries on your shoulder*

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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 4:18 am 
Sumerul
Sumerul

Joined: Fri Mar 05, 2010 2:38 am
Posts: 2974
Location: Israel
*makes it all better*


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 4:28 am 
Smeric
Smeric

Joined: Tue Oct 04, 2011 12:15 pm
Posts: 2085
Location: Spain
Gay friendzones suck xD.


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 4:39 am 
Sumerul
Sumerul

Joined: Fri Mar 05, 2010 2:38 am
Posts: 2974
Location: Israel
Psht, friendzones. Who says a friends-relationship isn't as good as a relationship-relationship?


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 7:39 am 
Avisaru
Avisaru

Joined: Mon Jan 23, 2012 4:50 am
Posts: 352
Astraios wrote:
Psht, friendzones. Who says a friends-relationship isn't as good as a relationship-relationship?


Everyone who has ever wanted to be out of a friendzone.

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Warning: Recovering bilingual, attempting trilinguaility. Knowledge of French left behind in childhood. Currently repairing bilinguality. Repair stalled. Above content may be a touch off.


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 4:05 pm 
Avisaru
Avisaru
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Joined: Tue Dec 30, 2003 11:42 pm
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Eandil wrote:
Gay friendzones suck xD.

Gay friendzones are extremely permeable.


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 4:22 pm 
Avisaru
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Joined: Fri Sep 13, 2002 12:45 pm
Posts: 702
Location: Hole of Aspiration
... there are such things?


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 4:30 pm 
Smeric
Smeric

Joined: Tue Oct 04, 2011 12:15 pm
Posts: 2085
Location: Spain
Pthug wrote:
... there are such things?

Yes, and especially when one of the parties is not gay.


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 4:33 pm 
Avisaru
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then it's not fucking gay, is it


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 4:36 pm 
Smeric
Smeric

Joined: Tue Oct 04, 2011 12:15 pm
Posts: 2085
Location: Spain
Pthug wrote:
then it's not fucking gay, is it

It is? The hypothetical desired relationship is gay. Straight boy and [gay boy in love] is quite typical.


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 5:03 pm 
Avisaru
Avisaru
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Joined: Fri Sep 13, 2002 12:45 pm
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Location: Hole of Aspiration
shit in one hand and hypothecate in the other then tell me which fills first


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 7:33 pm 
Lebom
Lebom
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Joined: Mon Jul 02, 2012 6:11 pm
Posts: 129
Location: Ontario, Canada
Friend problems. Losing friends.

Feel useless, like a waste of life.

Making enemies.

Very depressed.

Want girlfriend.

No girls like me.

Advice?

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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Sun Jul 08, 2012 10:25 pm 
Smeric
Smeric
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Joined: Thu Aug 30, 2007 10:45 pm
Posts: 2373
Location: Santiago de Chile
Torco's Guide to Get Chicks
[disclaimer: I'm not a chick magnet exactly, but I can generally get a girl I like to like me back and do boygirl stuff. also, I don't fulfill all these criteria, but they're still valid]


conform physically to the aesthetic canons of your culture. this generally means
- be physically fit
- preferrably with a low BMI
- plenty of mass on your skeletical muscular system, most particularly in your upper body
- dress in a manner that is coherent with the image of a healthy, successful male
conform behaviourally to the aesthetic canons of your culture. this generally means
- act in a manner that is consistent with a happy, functional, successful human being
- be confident
- make people around you feel good about themselves
maintain, fake and/or pursue a mental state of relative well being
- really, girls don't normally like depressed, hysteric or psychotic people.
- also, when you're clear-minded and moderately happy, you're going to be healthier, funnier, more intelligent, all of which are conducent to get girls to like you
understand the evolutionary psychology behind attraction
- really, this is a pretty functional mechanism; women really do seek characteristics that correlate to fitness; health, confidence, success, intelligence, empathy, blablabla. If you aren't at the top of the pecking order, making a chick feel like you are will maximize your chances.
understand the semiotics behind attraction
- every woman is different, as is every man, and every intersex and transex and asexual and of fuck it , everyone's different, but the constant is that we find different traits attractive: some of us find attractive faith, others hope, others coolness, others money. However, it is hard and ill-fated to try to present yourself to each chick you wanna bang as the kind of man that girl might want to bang, so, instead of that, know your audience and identify women with whom your particular strengths might resonate. However, in this, culture is your friend: preference is not homogeneously distributed; younger women have patterns of attraction that are different from that of older women, rich women have different sensibilities to poor women. soo yeah, if you're a buff guy, pursue chicks that like buff dudes, if you're a smart dude, you'll have extra trouble wooing chicks that are intellectually uncurious. if you're not confident, try and go for chicks that have a strong maternal instinct.
understand the psychology behind attraction
- women tend to like dudes that resemble, at some levels, their fathers: not in the big picture, but in the little things. this is more anecdotal, but in my experience, most chicks who have dug me are the daugthers of men with a sense of humour that is very similar to mine: as sense of humor, there might be other traits that follow this patterns, probably tone of voice or something.

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Last edited by Torco on Mon Jul 09, 2012 11:19 am, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 10:18 am 
Smeric
Smeric
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Joined: Mon Jun 21, 2010 3:21 pm
Posts: 1088
Location: In this multiverse or another
Oh em gee guys I am goen out on my first real date with someone not psychotic or neurotic!

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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 12:08 pm 
Lebom
Lebom
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Joined: Mon Jul 02, 2012 6:11 pm
Posts: 129
Location: Ontario, Canada
@Torco:

thanks for spending the time writing it, I really appreciate it.
I'm not sure how much of it applies to me though.

I'm generally a quiet, unconfident person, though ironically I like to stand out.

I dress very formally (tie and blazer to public school), which attracted quite a few glances at first.

As for telling me to be happy:

"Telling a depressed person to be happy is like telling a blind person to look harder" -- @Tumblr, Twitter

I'll see if I can recover by the next school year, and get a fresh start.

Either way, thanks so much!

-JN

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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 6:20 pm 
Smeric
Smeric
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Joined: Thu Aug 30, 2007 10:45 pm
Posts: 2373
Location: Santiago de Chile
quiet, shy, formal-dressing guy that likes to stand out but hasn't yet learned enough social skills to successfully do that? that's an agle, man! that's the adorable angle. Plenty of chicks dig that shit! you just need to be pretty, and mysterious, and for the love of christ and thor DON'T BE CLINGY. nothing kills adorable like needy. just meh, you know, I'm really dark and mysterious, I bet you'd like to know me, wouldn't you? oh, but I only let special people get to know me, you know. I know, I attracted your attention in some way, but meh, I don't really care. I'm kind of like a puppy, though, I know, will you heal my soul? my soul has been scarred by something that sounds cool... yeah, no? okay, whatever, no probs.

xD

I know it sounds crazy, but eventually it will click. You don't *need* to be happy, I'm kind of fat and I get chicks, for example, you just need to play your advantages... and at least be funny and/or interesting. And if you're not confident, well, be meta-confident, that's even more attractive; like the guy that's really shy and you can really tell he's awkward but but it shows that he's making an effort and shit, that's adorable!

go forth and fondle, my man, go forth and fondle.

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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 7:39 pm 
Lebom
Lebom
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Joined: Mon Jul 02, 2012 6:11 pm
Posts: 129
Location: Ontario, Canada
wow, those are actually really good tips!

thanks!

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"Man is least himself when he speaks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will reveal his true face" --Oscar Wilde


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 8:20 pm 
Sumerul
Sumerul
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Joined: Mon Dec 22, 2003 12:35 pm
Posts: 3600
Location: Tokyo
Confidence is like a game. Most people IME think they're not any good at it or that they're faking it, even if outwardly they come across as confident. I'm a bit like that myself. It's all about seeming confident even if you don't feel it. It'll come eventually.


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Mon Jul 09, 2012 9:29 pm 
Smeric
Smeric
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Joined: Thu Aug 30, 2007 10:45 pm
Posts: 2373
Location: Santiago de Chile
finlay wrote:
Confidence is like a game. Most people IME think they're not any good at it or that they're faking it, even if outwardly they come across as confident. I'm a bit like that myself. It's all about seeming confident even if you don't feel it. It'll come eventually.

so fake it till you make it. not a bad method.


Jerian_Nostigia wrote:
wow, those are actually really good tips!
thanks!

you're quite welcome, bro. may you make many a miss moist.

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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 11:44 am 
Smeric
Smeric
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Joined: Thu May 24, 2007 11:34 pm
Posts: 1606
Location: Stockholm
Eandil wrote:
Gay friendzones suck xD.

Yeah. And he's even too poor to come and visit me. T_T

dunomapuka wrote:
Gay friendzones are extremely permeable.

I don't understand.
Wiktionary wrote:
Of or relating to substance, substrate, membrane or material that absorbs or allows the passage of fluids.

:S

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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 11:50 am 
Avisaru
Avisaru
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Joined: Mon Apr 25, 2011 12:29 pm
Posts: 485
Location: hinter schwedischen Gardinen
But I do.... oh, cheesus: I sure do. Read the last strophe: Material that absorbs or allows the passage of fluids.

>mfw
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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 12:37 pm 
Avisaru
Avisaru
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Joined: Fri Jun 20, 2003 4:56 pm
Posts: 690
Location: Gimaamaa onibaaganing
The "fluids" part is not an important part of the definition in this case; in this context it just means "a barrier that is easy to move through", i.e.: "[the metaphorical barrier represented by] a gay friendzone is easy to move/break through"


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 4:36 pm 
Avisaru
Avisaru
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Joined: Mon May 05, 2003 2:58 pm
Posts: 433
Location: The West Country
dunomapuka wrote:
Gay friendzones are extremely permeable.
Yeah, but... there is a qualitative difference between friends who sleep together and a relationship. Having sex with someone is not the same as "going steady". I think it can actually significantly worsen the mindfuck.

I know this is the romantic equivalent of First World Problems, but my boyfriend is still thousands of miles away having adventures and not here with me. I miss him.


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 Post subject: Re: Love Thread
PostPosted: Tue Jul 10, 2012 4:49 pm 
Avisaru
Avisaru
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Joined: Fri Sep 13, 2002 12:45 pm
Posts: 702
Location: Hole of Aspiration
Gulliver wrote:
I know this is the romantic equivalent of First World Problems, but my boyfriend is still thousands of miles away having adventures and not here with me. I miss him.
that is a legitimate romantic problem. you mean something like "he's with his friends in the other room and i haven't seen him since teatime :(("


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