The Contradictory Feelings Thread

[hwhatting]

I wish you a speedy recovery!

[alynnidalar]

Hey, finding a good dentist can be hard enough in your own country and language! That is something to celebrate.

[Risla]

Hey, finding a good dentist can be hard enough in your own country and language! That is something to celebrate.

Definitely! I'd actually heard some bad things about standards of dental care in Japan but I am definitely not disappointed.

[Risla]

argh, board errors made me triple post

[Risla]

augh, board errors made me triple post

[mèþru]

Hope you get better!

[linguoboy]

More evidence (if any were needed) that I'm an awful person:

So I had two "friends" who used to visit us frequently. They lived in Wisconsin and liked to come to Chicago for the weekend. We let them stay in our guest room. One time they had the bad luck to stay over the weekend right after we'd gotten my husband's cancer diagnosis. I wanted to let them know, but I just wasn't ready to talk about it yet. I'm sure they could tell something was wrong but they didn't know what and it seemed like I was avoiding them when I was just trying to get some recovery time. It was awkward and I felt really bad about it.

Some weeks later, one of them got in touch and said he'd be passing through again. I was trying to work myself up to explaining what was wrong and why I'd acted like I had. But as soon as he found out I'd be out of town on the weekend he wanted to crash with us, he cut the conversation short. Suddenly I felt like an idiot. I thought we had a friendship when really what we had was a convenient place to stay. Needless to say, I heard very little from him over the next couple years as my husband's health declined and he eventually died.

Flash forward to this week. That guy's husband has been posting about his health issues. He doesn't have a diagnosis yet, but he's not counting on the tumours turning out to be benign. Of course most of me is sad and upset for him. But a nasty little part of me remembers his husband's behaviour and thinks, "Now you'll find out what it's like."

[Vijay]

As unfortunate as that is to hear, honestly, I think you're being a little hard on yourself. I think anyone in the same circumstance would feel roughly the same way if not worse. I mean, I probably would.

[linguoboy]

I seemed to have worked through it. The husband is starting a blog to talk about his diagnosis and I gave him some pointers and told him I'd be following it. His better half is still in denial, so the poor sod is going to need all the support he can get.