Yeah, I get that (and other-sex partnerships can also have non-legal (eg religious) commitment ceremonies, although of course at least in this country they don't get the privilege of civil unions, damnit*). But maybe why that didn't spring to mind was that in my experience people are either "we're not married until we're officially married" (in which case he wouldn't be calling him his spouse), or they're "we're already married even if you don't recognise it", in which case I'd expect him to say "we're having our marriage recognised/registered/etc" rather than "we're having a wedding". I guess for me "wedding" is pretty strictly limited to "ceremony where people who are not married to each other become married to each other".
But then, I know somepeople speak of "weddings" when they talk about marriage-rejuvenation things (you know, those 'saying our vows again' things, like remarriage but when there hasn't been any separation in between), which is equally alien to me but people do say it, I think. So you're probably right that that's what Viktor was aiming at.
[And to be fair, I do know one couple who have gotten married to each other twice already in quick succession (without any separation in between) but only had two weddings, and talk of having another 'wedding' at some point too, as though a 'wedding' were just a big party thing.]
I don't understand linguoboy's distinction between 'spouse' and 'husband', though. How does that relate to federal vs state law? Surely if he is your spouse, and is male, he is by definition your husband?
*Seriously, this is fucking stupid. Gay couples can have a marriage or a civil union. Straight couples can't have civil unions legally recognised, only marriages. Not that I personally give give the slightest about the semantic differences between the two, but the inequality is utterly absurd, and I can't think of any coherent reason for it whatsoever.
But the river tripped on her by and by, lapping
as though her heart was brook: Why, why, why! Weh, O weh
I'se so silly to be flowing but I no canna stay!