zompist bboard

I've heard that it's bad to put yourself first.

No.

"Better" and "bad" are such vague terms that it's not really possible to answer this without context and a description of what your goals are ... "for you and me" is the more common word order.

In a semi-formal/journalistic register for published American English, "for you and me" is considered the preferred arrangement.

Traditionally it's considered "good form" to put the first person pronoun second, but colloquially I doubt many people care.

_________________
"But if of ships I now should sing, what ship would come to me,
What ship would bear me ever back across so wide a Sea?”

Same thing in French with politeness considerations..

Same thing in German.