The Contradictory Feelings Thread

[vampireshark]

Isn't a phd project something you commit yourself to for say three or four years? I don't think it's something you can just give up on now is it.

Try to go to conferences and the like abroad for a change of pace during your stay in ohio. I could imagine not wanting to stay in ohio indefinitely, it does not strike me as the most interesting place in the world.

In the US, a Ph.D. in the sciences is typically a five-year program: the first two are devoted to coursework with the last three to research. I'm in my third year.

Here's the situation: I applied for the project in Luxembourg last July. I got rejected for funding twice, once directly from the PI (not really a rejection, but that he had a more qualified applicant and that I didn't officially have a Master's degree, rendering me ineligible) and the other from a Luxembourgish funding organization, the FNR. The PI asked me to apply one final time for funding from the FNR, as it's something he wants to do and something I want to work on as well.

My current adviser knows I applied for the funding from the FNR and does support it, primarily because he's in a perpetually precarious funding position and doesn't know how exactly he'd fund me for the final year of my Ph.D. I'm only guaranteed one additional year of funding, and that funding's only if I split my time between the project I'm working on and another industrial project. And, quite frankly, I would prefer to spend an extra year in graduate school with stable funding rather than being in a situation where I don't know if I'll be able to keep being paid. Another part of the precarious funding issue is that I don't know how much funding there'd be for conferences or travel.

So, really, it more boils down to guaranteed financial stability, a project I want to work, and being in Europe on versus a project I really want to continue with, primarily because of its potential and the cool things that can be done with it, and a precarious funding situation.

[Cedh]

So, really, it more boils down to guaranteed financial stability, a project I want to work, and being in Europe on versus a project I really want to continue with, primarily because of its potential and the cool things that can be done with it, and a precarious funding situation.

Would it be an option to go to Luxemburg now, but return to your current project (i.e. dealing with the same research questions, but possibly in a new environment) after you've finished your PhD there?

[sirdanilot]

I think that still doesn't resolve the problem of the financial instability.

[linguoboy]

Do I really want to raise my blood pressure by returning to that discussion of heterosexism to see what all the clueless straight people have been posting? I guess I must, since according to them, it my duty to "educate" them in these matters.

[sirdanilot]

Yes yes, educating people on the internet is a very useful way to spend your time, yes.

[linguoboy]

Ah, seems the most obdurate contributor has flounced. Well that makes things easier.

[vampireshark]

So, really, it more boils down to guaranteed financial stability, a project I want to work, and being in Europe on versus a project I really want to continue with, primarily because of its potential and the cool things that can be done with it, and a precarious funding situation.

Would it be an option to go to Luxemburg now, but return to your current project (i.e. dealing with the same research questions, but possibly in a new environment) after you've finished your PhD there?

It's potentially possible, especially with the grant opportunities that are available for postdoctoral fellowships, but that'd be three years down the road.

[Aili Meilani]

I was just discharged from a mental hospital. My stay there was the single best thing that happened to my Silesian in years.

[sirdanilot]

I am happy that you are feeling better now and I hope that you can continue this. But what do you mean with 'silesian' here is that a typo?

[sirdanilot]

As for my contradictory feelings:

I am doing a side-job in high school education, and now I am being planned in at a higher level (I was always more of an assistant). This produces mixed feelings, as although I am happy I am granted this opportunity, it will help develop myself and there is also some better payment, I am also a bit anxious as I have never done this before at such a level.

[Aili Meilani]

But what do you mean with 'silesian' here is that a typo?

It's a language.

[sirdanilot]

I know Silesia but I didn't know the language and especially I didn't know how on earth Silesian could be related to 'I was staying in a mental hospital'.

[linguoboy]

I know Silesia but I didn't know the language and especially I didn't know how on earth Silesian could be related to 'I was staying in a mental hospital'.

[alynnidalar]

I know Silesia but I didn't know the language and especially I didn't know how on earth Silesian could be related to 'I was staying in a mental hospital'.

I'd assume Aili Meilani is implying that they were able to use their time in the hospital to study up on Silesian?

[Viktor77]

I love the project I'm working on for my Ph.D. It's fun and poses a lot of interesting questions, plus there are a lot of pretty colors. And I've invested a lot of time and energy into the project.

But... I don't want to be in Ohio. I feel restless and like I need a change of scenery. And the project I applied for a grant to work on is one that's interesting and in Luxembourg, which is a plus, but I would feel horrible abandoning the project I'm currently working with.

So, when it comes down to it, I really don't know what I want: to stick it out and finish up here, or to go to a place I really want to be to work on a completely new and different Ph.D. project. I really don't know.

I love Luxembourg and I would never utter a bad word about that amazing place, but besides its central location, in terms of living there, Luxembourg is probably not much better than Ohio. First it's small, you have to be able to entertain yourself, all big cities are at least two hours away. Second, it's expensive and housing is hard to find. You need to be of the mindset where you enjoy peace and quiet, good living but don't expect a lot in the way of entertainment and opportunities. This is my experience there. I fit this mindset, so I enjoyed it.

[Aili Meilani]

I'd assume Aili Meilani is implying that they were able to use their time in the hospital to study up on Silesian?

Not really, most patients and some of the staff preferred speaking Silesian to Polish. I already know some Silesian, so I used my time to learn by osmosis.

[alynnidalar]

I'd assume Aili Meilani is implying that they were able to use their time in the hospital to study up on Silesian?

Not really, most patients and some of the staff preferred speaking Silesian to Polish. I already know some Silesian, so I used my time to learn by osmosis.

Oh, I see. Makes sense!

[Viktor77]

I'd assume Aili Meilani is implying that they were able to use their time in the hospital to study up on Silesian?

Not really, most patients and some of the staff preferred speaking Silesian to Polish. I already know some Silesian, so I used my time to learn by osmosis.

Ooh I might need to speak to you because I am interested in the status of German in Silesia today. And the former status of Polish/Silesian in Lower Silesia before WWII.

[sirdanilot]

I know Silesia but I didn't know the language and especially I didn't know how on earth Silesian could be related to 'I was staying in a mental hospital'.

I did not ask you whether you cared did i? Did your mother not learn you not to speak if you are not told to ?

[linguoboy]

I did not ask you whether you cared did i? Did your mother not learn you not to speak if you are not told to ?

Buah...what?

The idiomatic phrasing in English would be "Didn't your mother ever teach not to speak unless spoken to?" My reply to that would be, "No, I wasn't actually raised in a bourgeois family in Wilhelmine Germany. Why do you ask?" (And since this isn't a policy you yourself follow, why even bring it up?)

Here's the thing, sirdanilot: You asked a question; Aili Meilani answered it. At this point, you could've asked a follow up question (like alynnidalar did, thus netting a fuller explanation of Aili's cryptic statement). Or you could've said "Thanks". Or said nothing and left it at that. But, no, you have to give us all an explanation as to why you found that cryptic statement uninterpretable. Why? No one requested it. The only reason I can see is because you didn't want anyone to mistakenly assume from your question that you were a single iota more ignorant than you actually are.

That's what no one cares about. You didn't know what "silesian" meant in that context. So what? I'll wager any number of people reading that didn't. We don't think any less of them for it. Okay, maybe someone reading this thread did think, "He's never heard of Silesian? What a maroon!" If so, they're dicks. But why bother responding to them preemptively? It just makes you seem insecure and defensive.

[sirdanilot]

Why are you making a problem out of my statement? I simply explained what was, to me, unclear about his sentence. What on earth is the problem with that. This way you can make a problem out of anything anyone ever says. It's of absolutely no use.

Of course the mother thing was a mere joke/snarky response and nothing more, I could have probably left that out, sorry for that.

[KathTheDragon]

And once again, Sirdanilot has it explained for him exactly what he shouldn't have done, what he should've done instead, and he acts all victimised and oppressed. Classic.

[sirdanilot]

Victim-blamer !

[linguoboy]

Of course the mother thing was a mere joke/snarky response and nothing more, I could have probably left that out, sorry for that.

Thus my joking/snarky response. Don't worry, I don't take that sort of thing personally.

[Risla]

I fly to Japan two weeks from tomorrow. On one hand, HOLY SHIT EXCITING. On the other hand, it is also just a bit terrifying (as it should be!), and also I am going to miss my family dogs terribly.