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zompist bboard • View topic - Venting thread that still excludes eddy (2)

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 Post subject: Re: Venting thread
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 10:46 am 
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 Post subject: Re: Venting thread
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 1:33 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: Venting thread
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 2:04 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: Venting thread
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 2:22 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: Venting thread
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 2:24 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: Venting thread
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 2:29 pm 
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"It will not come by waiting for it. It will not be said, 'Here it is,' or 'There it is.' Rather, the Kingdom of the Father is spread out upon the earth, and men do not see it."
– The Gospel of Thomas


Last edited by Xephyr on Mon May 11, 2015 2:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Venting thread
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 2:31 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: Venting thread
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 2:34 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: Venting thread
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 2:36 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: Venting thread
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 2:50 pm 
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PostPosted: Tue May 12, 2015 5:16 pm 
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I have never dealt with so much bureaucracy as applying for my and my spouse's visa for Belgium to study for a year. First my university is barely giving me any help so it's basically just, oh figure it out. Second, each document has so many contingencies, so much stuff to gather. I've been on the phone more than 15 hours in two days. I've gone back and forth with the embassy in New York. Now I'm worried the processing time for my spouse's visa will be greater than the time we tend to leave to Belgium. There's another thing to ask them about. Not to mention my Obamacare is a disaster right now. And I'm planning a wedding, well a courthouse wedding. I just booked the judge today in St Paul, MN for early next month.

After doing all this, and with more to come, my basic question is, HOW ON EARTH DO STUDENTS JUST UP AND STUDY ABROAD SO EASILY? Who is doing all of this for them, because I need that person.

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PostPosted: Tue May 12, 2015 6:13 pm 
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PostPosted: Tue May 12, 2015 6:35 pm 
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PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2015 2:23 am 
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PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2015 5:45 am 
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Well, it's extra hard if you want to take your partner with you, because student visas are simply not made for that sort of thing. You are aware that he won't be allowed to work for the first 5 months, right? Unless it's on the US military base

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PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2015 7:12 am 
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PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2015 7:45 am 
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PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2015 10:24 am 
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PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2015 11:26 am 
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PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2015 11:37 am 
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PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2015 2:49 pm 
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Yeah, I get that (and other-sex partnerships can also have non-legal (eg religious) commitment ceremonies, although of course at least in this country they don't get the privilege of civil unions, damnit*). But maybe why that didn't spring to mind was that in my experience people are either "we're not married until we're officially married" (in which case he wouldn't be calling him his spouse), or they're "we're already married even if you don't recognise it", in which case I'd expect him to say "we're having our marriage recognised/registered/etc" rather than "we're having a wedding". I guess for me "wedding" is pretty strictly limited to "ceremony where people who are not married to each other become married to each other".

But then, I know somepeople speak of "weddings" when they talk about marriage-rejuvenation things (you know, those 'saying our vows again' things, like remarriage but when there hasn't been any separation in between), which is equally alien to me but people do say it, I think. So you're probably right that that's what Viktor was aiming at.

[And to be fair, I do know one couple who have gotten married to each other twice already in quick succession (without any separation in between) but only had two weddings, and talk of having another 'wedding' at some point too, as though a 'wedding' were just a big party thing.]

I don't understand linguoboy's distinction between 'spouse' and 'husband', though. How does that relate to federal vs state law? Surely if he is your spouse, and is male, he is by definition your husband?





*Seriously, this is fucking stupid. Gay couples can have a marriage or a civil union. Straight couples can't have civil unions legally recognised, only marriages. Not that I personally give give the slightest about the semantic differences between the two, but the inequality is utterly absurd, and I can't think of any coherent reason for it whatsoever.

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But the river tripped on her by and by, lapping
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PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2015 3:10 pm 
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PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2015 3:11 pm 
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PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2015 4:55 pm 
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Have you told your friend he's being disrespectful?


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PostPosted: Wed May 13, 2015 5:03 pm 
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